So I woke up this morning finally accepting enough to ask myself, "what can I learn and how can I grow from this experience?" The answer was fairly simple - ask my peers who have seen the show for honest feedback. I even asked the reviewer. (I finally read the review tonight. I disagree with his assessment but it's a fair opinion. I expected nothing less.)
So far the feedback has been surprising. Most of the issues have to do with the script, almost nothing to do with my directing. Which I guess goes to show how personally I was taking it. I now have a sense of detachment about it, which feels really nice.
Tonight's show was the best yet. The cast has found its groove. And there were a lot of friends tonight in the audience - Soheil Parsa from Modern Times Stage Company, Anton Piatigorsky, who wrote Kabbalistic, my brother, some friends who have supported my work in the past, and others who I wanted to see my work. We even had a return viewer. Their response was gratifying to see.
I still believe in this show and it's doing what I had intended for it - to spark discussion. If I get my own professional goals out of the way, the show is a success. And I hope more people will see it before it closes this weekend. Still three shows to go!